The things you learn

As I've said in prior posts, lately I've been spending more time in my lab. I've also said that I'm enjoying the process quite a bit. What I haven't mentioned are some of the things that I have seen my students doing in the lab that make me wonder what on earth goes on when I'm not around.

Some of the more interesting and head scratching things that I have noticed in the past week are below. And please don't assume that this has any bearing on my ability to teach, I can only instruct them on the things that I can predict, I can't imagine all the crazy things that students can (and do) do.

- Using a multi-hundred dollar calibrated micropipette to fill a vial non-quantitatively. Most people just use disposable glass Pasteur pipettes to fill the vials by eye. This student was using the most expensive pipette we have and they weren't even using it properly, they were still filling the vial by eye.

- Making a 500 mL buffer solution, which incidentally was almost too low in concentration, when really only about one tenth that volume was necessary. Ok, this one isn't so bad, but seriously, if you've been working with these systems for six months and have never run out of any solution that was only 100 mL to start with, why make five times that much for a one quick test?

- Telling me that they are doing a procedure in one way, but in actuality the procedure they are doing is very very different. And not realizing that there was anything wrong with this, even though this was making the procedure about five times too long.

- Believing that methanol will dissociate in water to produce hydroxide. Ok, most people don't know what the hell I'm talking about here, the chemists however are wondering why I let an art student into my lab. The sad part is that this student wants to get a Ph.D. in chemistry!

- Tracking me through two different buildings to ask me if they need to calibrate the pH meter; since they thought they saw me use it earlier in the day. Ok, so lets forget for a moment that there are these really neat things called PHONES! But the calibration of a pH meter is pretty fucking simple. In fact, all the solutions are sitting right next to the damn thing, along with the typed instructions! It should only take you two minutes to calibrate, and even if I did calibrate it hours earlier there is nothing wrong with calibrating it again, it's actually the smart thing to do. On the other hand, searching me out to ask me if you have to do it effectively demonstrate your laziness and make me wonder if you have ever been able to calibrate the pH meter properly previously.

So I can now say that being back in the lab is a mixed blessing. On one hand, I am getting back to what I truly enjoy about the science, the experimentation. On the other, I'm now scared for the equipment in the lab and I desperately wonder if I need to install web cams to supervise them even when I'm not in the lab. Though I would also need to add in some kind of sound system to tell them to stop what they are doing and actually think first.