Smooth man, real smooth

On Friday night I figured it would be nice to treat Deirdre to a nice night out. The plan was rather simple, dinner at a nice restaurant and then catch a late show at the improv comedy club nearby. Ok, it's not the most glamorous date but it was still nice...well the parts that we got to.

Now I was at least smart enough to make reservations at both destinations, an 8:00 dinner and 10:30 show, so plenty of time to have a leisurely meal and make our way over to the club. Well thanks in part to my slight memory lapse on the cross street of the restaurant we arrived about ten minutes late. Fortunately they hadn't given up on the reservation and we still had a nice cozy booth table. I'd honestly expected them to have move my reservation to a shitty little one near a washroom...maybe I've been reading too much of WaiterRant.net

So after a really good meal, and as it seems is always the case in American restaurants, there was far too much on the plate to eat in one sitting. And some people wonder why babies here are so fat they can't use car seats...I'm not making this up. So since we had some time to kill before the show and dogie bags from the restaurant we figured we should stop at Deirdre's place to drop them off.

Now this is where I got really smooth. I gave Deirdre the most crushing headbutt of my life! I'm not talking about some little bumped forehead action. I mean full on, teeth rattling, all my strength blow just above her temple from my forehead. And I did it perfectly, I barely even felt the contact, the sound of her teeth knocking together sounded harder than it felt to hit my head. Yup, what can I say, I'm just smooth.

Now before the nasty comments come in about me abusing my girlfriend let me clarify the situation. We were standing in the entryway of her apartment and starting to move closer to each other and hug. That's when we both felt the shoe in the way between us. Coincidentally, this was also the same time that both looked down to see said shoe. Now, normally I praise the fact that Deirdre is 5'10", being that I'm 6'2" she seems to be the ideal height. Namely, I don't have to bend in half to hug her or put my arm around her shoulders. Well, it seems that there is one drawback to such comparable heights. Namely if we both look down at the same time, my head will come crashing down onto hers.

Needless to say I felt like crap because of that. Now even though Deirdre had as a child suffered a few landings on her head she still seems to be rather robust, as the blow only gave her a bit of a headache. Though these past blows to the head may answer the question a few friends have had about her (i.e. "Why is she dating you?"). But due to the headache we decided to forgo the comedy show in favour of resting on the couch.

Ok, you may now berate me for almost knocking my girlfriend out, I know it's coming.