I'm going to miss the car...

Any of you who have been regular readers of this blog know that shortly after I got here I was given the keys to a car and an apartment (neither of which were mine). Well the owner of said car and apartment is coming back to Minneapolis today, so there go my wheels.

I have to admit, I have really come to enjoy, or maybe I have simply become accustomed to, having a car. And this car was particularly fun, it's a manual Jetta, which though I had never seriously driven a manual car before I became quite comfortable driving this one quickly. And though I don't use the car often, there are a number of little things that I found it highly useful for which I will have to change, such as getting my groceries. Though my girlfriend lives right by the grocery store, so I'm sure something can be worked out should it be necessary.

Despite losing the car, I'm not unhappy about the whole situation, in fact I will be quite happy once the weekend is done. See the girl is coming back to pack up her apartment, squeeze what she can into her car, and then she is going back off to San Diego. So in doing this the last ties between us will be cut.

Yeah, I'll admit, I was happy to meet her. At first I was thrilled to meet someone outside of work. But after she moved to San Diego, leaving me with the car, I started to realize just what the nature of our relationship was. See for the first while she would talk to me a lot while she was out there. I figured this was a good thing, I even thought perhaps she liked me. But then the calls stooped and she seemed to disappear. Only to call me on rare occasions, needing a favour. And then I started to see what I was to her, I was someone to prop her up, make her feel good about herself and help her along her way. I thought it was cute that she would often say that she "wanted to hear a friendly voice" when she called. Then I got a call at 3 am, with her crying on the other end of the line saying pretty much the same thing. This was the first time I had spoken to her in weeks, if not a month.

Those who know me recognize that I will give whatever I can to anyone I consider a friend. Hell, why else would I have participated in about 6 moves since I got here (and I'm not counting moving myself, which I did virtually alone). I don't really expect anything in return, save that those people that I have helped will be there should I need it. As far as this girl is concerned, I truly doubt that I would have been able to count on her had she been in the same city as me. It's funny how it always seemed as though it was an after-thought when she asked me how I was.

But I don't hold grudges. She made her choices, and I've made mine. I wouldn't even say that I made a poor choice, at the time it seemed like a logical one, even though the situation was rather odd. And though I do feel as though I was used, I'm not going to let it change who I am and how I deal with people. Though I'm now much more aware of the behaviour of someone who is likely to use me. So though I strongly suspect that she will ask for my help this weekend I'm not going to be part of it.

Once she has her keys back I'm done with her. And though this may seem to be harsh, I'm really fed up with her. After she called Monday to confirm that she was coming back Thursday she didn't e-mail me her flight information like I asked (since I have her keys I have to pick her up). I had to e-mail her Wednesday morning to get the details, though all I got was that her flight is coming in at 5:40 pm...well that's bloody useful, if this was a one runway airport, not the hub for Northwest! Maybe she could have included a flight number or at least the airline, hell I don't even know what departure city to look for, I assume that it's direct, but there are no guarantees to that.

So yeah, I won't be too sad when she is gone and I have nothing more to do with her. I will however miss the car.

See Aaron, I'm not perfectly happy, there is still plenty of bitterness in me to keep you smiling. But as it was pointed out to me today, it's evident to others when I've been around Deirdre, I seem to have a bit bigger grin on my face. Which is why the stuff with this girl is not really bothering me because I have some lovely plans with my girlfriend this weekend.