Just pissed off.

Ok, I know that I'm going to touch on a subject that I've hit on before, but I just need to vent. The drivers in this city are the ABSOLUTE WORST that I have ever encountered. I wish to apologize profusely to Edmontonians. I had for years sworn that there were no worse drivers, I stand humbly corrected.

You see these days I tend to be driving to and from work and though I'm usually the passenger I can't help getting aggravated by the utter ignorance of other drivers. One fun one from tonight was the jackass who, on a very busy downtown street, allowed a gap of nearly a block to open up in front of him as he putzed along at maybe 25 mph. And why was this? Well, he was talking on his cell phone of course. Listen to me carefully people, you do not need to be talking on your phone at all times. There is nothing that is that pressing. And frankly I'm sick of waiting behind, or nearly getting sideswiped by some mental midget on their cell phone while driving on the highway and drifting across lanes.

Another one that has been pissing me off, and I know this isn't "PC" in any way, but old people should not be allowed on the road during the rush-hour times. Let's face it they are old, they are retired and they drive way too damn slow and are seemingly lost most of the time. I found a great example on the way home tonight, shortly after getting around the jackass on his cell phone. This old woman (actually there were two in the car, clearly two heads are not better than one) was barely doing 20 mph, with open road in front of her. At one point she was in the middle lane at an intersection, there was a turning lane to her left and a regular lane to her right. As she approached the GREEN light she had her right turn signal on and started to BRAKE. Of course she went straight through the intersection, with the turn signal still flashing. After I got around her I noticed that when we got to a stop light she was the first car behind me, though there was room for at least another car between us. I've said it before, I'll say it again, after 50 there should be mandatory drivers tests every 5 years. And if we can't do that, I say limit the old folks to driving between 10:00 and 3:00.

The other group that I hate to see driving downtown are those who own SUVs. This is because nobody who lives in the city itself owns an SUV it's just not a city vehicle. The people that own SUVs are living out in the suburbs, and that's where those vehicles should stay, nice open roads with little traffic. Come to think of it I don't think SUV means Sports Utility Vehicle let's face it nobody uses them like they show on tv. I think it actually stands for Sub-Urban Vehicle. Because once the people who drive them get into an urban environment they are screwed! These people do not have the coping skills to deal with life in a city. I'm sure they check the door locks every time they see a black man in a suit. Hell, these people actually hit the brakes while going through green lights, I shit you not. The other day I was behind some ugly BMW SUV and the idiot driving it started to break 1/4 of the way down the block. Now I just figured that there were a lot of cars in front of us (mainly because I can't see around the damn things). It turns out that he was the ONLY car in front of me, he rode the breaks for 3/4 of a block! The idiot must crap his pants every time he sees a yellow light.

There are many more horrid drivers out there, and countless examples, but they all generally fall into those three categories. Now if only I had some way of clearly expressing the frustration that these drivers cause me. I mean sure, I could flip them the bird, but that really doesn't get the point across. I really do want to teach and help these people...ok, I want to ban cell phones in cars, old people from the road at rush hour and SUVs from downtown...I wonder if there are any "slurs" for those kinds of discrimination?

Oh on a parting note could someone explain this logic to me. I have a package that was sent to me by the mail. Since I'm not home when the mail comes it's waiting for me to pick it up at the post office. The office is open from 9 am to 5 pm weekdays and 9 am to 1 pm Saturday. What the hell kind of service is this? How many people are free to go to the post office between 9 and 5? And to get there in time on a Saturday I have to be up before noon and it wouldn't be to go biking! I'm starting to understand postal shootings, though I'm just curious why it's postal workers doing the shooting?