Sunday, September 11, 2005

A dating project

So if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, or just happen to know me, you know that I'm 28 years old and chronically single. I'm not saying that this is a horrible thing, I have been able to pursue any opportunity that presented itself in my life without having to worry about how it would effect a girlfriend. Let's face it, picking up and moving across the country back in 1999 and now having move to Minneapolis would have been a lot more difficult with a significant other in tow.

Though I do enjoy the Independence it does feel as though something is lacking, in particular the knowledge that someone out there cares for me (yes, I know I have great friends that care deeply for me, but there are certain things that you just can't get from a friend). So I try to meet women and see where things can go, but I haven't had any success of late. I'll admit that my lifestyle plays a part in that, the bike club and dodgeball aren't exactly teeming with women. And yes I know I should fall back on my old standby of the dance club, but I just don't think that they are the same here. Plus I am supposed to start doing that again, now in October, with a girl from the bike club, but the last e-mail I sent (three days ago) seems to have been ignored. So I can't say I'm holding my breath on that one. And yeah there is a girl from dodgeball that I would like to go out with, and I have asked, but it seems that her schedule is quite full these days. So where else does one go to meet women? I could try the bar scene again, but that wasn't even successful when I was drinking. No, come to think of it, I was often able to meet women then, though it was usually my buddies that got all the fun in the end.

So short of accosting random women on the street I decided to try internet dating. Actually this isn't something all that new to me, I'd tried it in Edmonton. I'm obviously desperate to be trying it again after that mess. Though I did meet a couple of nice girls the relationships that developed weren't exactly ideal. There was one girl that I dated for about a week, then was replaced while I was camping a week later. And sadly that's about as good as it got. There were those who blatantly lied, some who were incredibly needy, some made monumental commitments from minor statements. Hell the latest one I have found was a girl who claimed to be from Minneapolis, well it turns out she's from Yaroslavl Russia!

To be honest I don't know why I decided to waste my money on internet dating yet again, but I did. One of the biggest problems is that internet dating is a system with no accountability. First off it seems to be the unwritten rule that the guys are to pay to be able to contact the women (so the equality thing wasn't for true equality, just those cases when the women were getting the short end?). Another aspect that just puzzles me is that I have had a number of instances when a woman winked, smiled or whatever cute name they use for the free way to say 'look at me' and after I write to them I get no response. Well maybe I come off as a complete jerk (or maybe it's not as a big enough jerk...) but for some reason it frequently seems that they lose interest right away. In other cases women have just stopped responding to messages after a while, no explanation, just no response.

So since I have a membership to a dating site at the moment I figured let's have some fun with it. Here is the link to my profile (feel free to make fun of me as you wish). What I would like you to do is to search through the profiles in my area (Minneapolis, zip code 55404) and see who you think would be a good match for me. Post a link to them in the comments page and I will write to them (if there is anything specific you want me to say you can include that as well). This will be a little experiment to see if I just naturally pick women who have no interest in me or if the whole system sucks as much as I believe it does. At the very least I may be able to get some funny posts out of the whole thing.

Now before this gets started please realize that I am serious about wanting to meet someone, this is my cry for help to my friends to set me up, but as nobody knows anyone in Minneapolis you can do it this way. Secondly I am not doing this to make fun of the women on the site, though if anything humourous comes from it I will write about it. Finally I do not mean to knock internet dating. I know several people for whom it has been successful, including my current boss who meet his wife that way. So with that in mind please search the yahoo personals and see if you can find me a date (good luck in that).

7 Comments:

Blogger CMac said...

Not sure if for you age is a factor, so I tried to stay pretty close to home base in that field.

The Shy Extrovert: http://personals.yahoo.com/us/preview/preview?search=1&resulttype=1&kws=0&searchinternal=1&position=3&total=1000&adid=personals-1019006877-633774&affid=&searchview=1&searchsort=1&speed=2&advanced=&primary=&searchname=

Cute Nerd Seeks fun:
http://personals.yahoo.com/us/preview/preview?search=1&resulttype=1&kws=0&searchinternal=1&position=1&total=1000&adid=personals-1108165325-117312&affid=&searchview=1&searchsort=1&speed=2&advanced=&primary=&searchname=

I'm sure you've already contacted them, but who knows! Good luck man

7:08 a.m.

 
Blogger Christopher Robin said...

Irene - As far as meeting women goes I'm trying to make an effort to get out to places where it could be more likely. As I said in the post, I really need to get back into dancing. As for finding your blog, I think I came across it through the next blog button, just skimming around for interesting ones, which it was. Oh, as for the heights, I guess I just haven't set an upper or lower limit, though I would have to say that there probably is a lower limit, I just don't know what it is.

7:37 p.m.

 
Blogger pacatrue said...

Alright, an excuse to look at pics of single women and not feel guilty. I'm all over that. How about:

Add to shopping cart!
How can you resist my adorable puppy?
The Shy Extrovert
Q-T seeks Swee-T
(Insert witty headline here.)
I'm sick of getting frog as gifts!
Seeking fun guy

And that is where I hit my "you must sign up to keep looking at profiles" limit. Good luck to you. Supposedly a couple of them were "Online Now!"

6:29 a.m.

 
Blogger pacatrue said...

Oh, and I was thinking of rephrasing your bit about "I have a PhD in chemistry." Can come off as if you are flashing your degrees to impress people. As I am in a doctoral program, I understand what that means, but it can come off the wrong way. Just say you are a doctor or a lawyer or a chemist, and the ones you want will know what you went through. People will jump at "I'm a doctor" but might be turned off at "I'm a M.D./Ph.D researcher who graduated first in his class at one of the nation's premier medical schools. I already have a 6-figure income."

6:34 a.m.

 
Blogger Christopher Robin said...

Thanks for the suggestions guys. I'll try and get on e-mailing them and see what happens.

Pacatrue - you really took the suggestion to heart didn't you, there are quite a few to check out.

12:46 p.m.

 
Blogger pacatrue said...

Basically, I looked for anyone between the ages of 23-35 that seemed like she was 1) active 2) graduated from college 3)wasn't totally obviously fake, 4) was kinda cute to me, and 5) didn't need to get drunk every night. Sure, in the real world, you might fall for an intelligent person who never made it to college and likes to wait for you on the couch while you are out biking, but the exceptions are for you to find. I just went off labels.

2:18 a.m.

 
Blogger taleanski said...

i really dont know your taste (*duh* obviously, cuz i dont know u) but since im a busybody n i always enjoy match-making, i checked out some for you! maybe you can check these out:

1. Looking for a reason to believe in love.
2. Sassy single seeks some new friends
3. Honest, friendly, real. (Strongly recommended. Her height range for her match is the same as yours!=P i just think its funny~ And she loves to dance! I'd go for her if i were a guy. unless you dont like pets, i think she's quite something!)
4. Bet I can make ya smile;)
5. An update...

1:51 a.m.

 

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